Turning Negativity Into Positivity: Escaping Negativity Before It Got The Best Of Me… – Dianne Furphy

Please join me in welcoming guest blogger Dianne Furphy. Dianne is a mother, wife, painter, fellow blogger, and holds a BA in Psychology and an Associates in Early Childhood Education. She’s come a long way, and battled a lot of adversity to get where she is today. So please stop by, visit, and help support her blog Create What You Want at: createwhatyouwant.org .

“Fear is a habit; so is self-pity, defeat, anxiety, despair, hopelessness and resignation. You can eliminate all of these negative habits with two simple resolves: I can!! …And I will!!” ~Anonymous

From what I remember, I was a negative person ever since my teenage years; right after my mother died at the age of 15. Not until my early twenties I started making a gradual turn towards the positive side of life.

Like I mentioned in my previous personal experiences posts, my hubby [and my dear cousin, along with other very few friends] are the ones to thank for making me realize how good life can be in every situation that comes at me. I would have to say that I am still in the process of changing; especially working on a better me, a more positive me. But who isn’t still in the process of changing? Aren’t we all forever changing in such ways—either negative or positive? …I like to think so.

Some people who once knew the negative side of me—who basically grew up with me—seem not to understand where I am coming from today. If anything, they think I am crazy and think I preach too much positive talk. My opinion: there is never too much positivity in one’s life. I try to be a positive influence in the people’s lives that I love and care about but sometimes it’s a battle when they just don’t get it. So where does that leave us? …On opposites ends of the spectrum.

Being that I was a negative person many years back and changing my whole entire perspective, attitude and thoughts and focusing only on the better side of life, it is extremely difficult to even put myself back how I used to think with the whole negative outlook. I just don’t comprehend it anymore. It is odd to me that I was once told from a person who is not on the same page as me with the whole positive perspective that they missed the old me. The old me, the one that did not have a care in the world, who did drugs, drank way too much alcohol for my own good, selfish, suicidal and all the negative that goes along with it.

Over a period of years, I had to train my mind to refocus all of my thoughts on the good in life. Once I started believing I could do this, I started setting goals for myself and once I started completed them goals, I started to realize how much of a better person I was becoming. I believe the first goal of mine was to quit doing drugs and drinking alcohol, then it was quitting smoking cigarettes and even overcame an eating disorder I was struggling with for so many years.

From then on out, my life just kept getting better. The first real big thing I ever did for myself was enroll myself into school and four years later, I graduated with honors, holding a cumulative G.P.A. of a 3.97 which is something I am most proud of and on top of that having a son and being the best mother that I can be. I am still setting high goals for myself because it is a challenge in my life; it is what keeps me motivated and keeps me living my life to the fullest. It seems life only keeps getting better by wanting to do better for myself.

I changed what I had to so I could escape that negative, unhappy life I was living. Now all I can do is hope for the people I love and care about to overcome their sense of fear of changing their life for the better. I know they have what it takes as long as they put their mind to it and use their full potential to do so. For I am always here for my loved ones and even strangers; if everyone could see I want to be that positive influence for them since not many of us have that supportive guidance.

“We cannot change our past. We can not change the fact that people act in a certain way. We can not change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.”~ Charles R. Swindoll

Create What You Want

The First Rung – D. Sager

Please join me in welcoming fellow blogger and all around awesome individual Drew Sager. Drew is a writer, blogger, musician, and poet. In his own words:

“I’m an apologist and an apostate. I’ve been knocked down, way down, and fought my way back up, way up. I’ve been an advocate of peace and a destroyer of the same, in a word, I am dichotomy”.

So, please check out his blog Opinions Of Eye. You can also find his works on Broowaha and Life As A Human. You’ll be glad you did.

Reaching up from this muddy pit
My hand finds the first rung
I’m not letting go of it, my feet still stuck
Screaming at the top of my lungs
From this first rung on the ladder
I will not be thrown
Everything in me screaming, you can’t do it
Everyone around me laughing at my attempts
No comfort, no friends when your down this low
The first rung is all you have
Yet I climb, slapping for the next rung, I will ascend
Out of this frothing mire
I will not let go, beaten down time by time
I find myself alone, beginning again
I shake myself from my own doubt
Now I find myself afraid to succeed
What will be required of me?
No more easy carefree existence
The struggle becomes necessary to stay on the ladder.
At the bottom, swimming aimlessly in the lost masses
Who cares what you do?
As you climb out, everyone looks at you, they are encouraged by your rebellion
To climb out of their own mess, to take the challenge of living again.
This first rung, the hardest, taking the most courage to live beyond
The lies spoken to you from those in your youth, and by your lovers
Who are no longer there.
Discomfort at having to leave your habits, your friends.
Not everyone will follow you up,
Most times, no one will.
You will have to meet those who are climbing on your way up.
You see they left the mire long ago,
Every now and then glancing back to see the despair
Which they escaped so narrowly.
So I cling, to this first rung, by tenacity, hard to define
This first rung is life, this first rung is mine.

Opinions Of Eye
Life As A Human

Call Me on a Good Day – Lauren K

Today I would like to welcome Guest Blogger Lauren K. Lauren and I have been speaking back and forth via email, and she wanted to share a song she wrote and performed. She’s also been through some rough times, but takes those emotions and channels them through her talent…music. She also is a writer and a blogger, so please check out her blogs Musical Seconds and Second Fresh.

(Lyrics found at link above)

I wrote this song during a time where I was dealing with a break-up whilst having family troubles and finishing my thesis (fun, fun!) I was still really trying to hold my family and social life together, but at the same time I just wanted to crawl into a hole and hide.

I find that songwriting is a particularly useful way for me to process what is going on “behind the scenes” whilst dealing with a whole heap of crap in the outside world.

It’s not an escape so to speak, in fact its the opposite, it helps me to stop pretending.  I think processing our emotions is a really important part of acceptance and growth.

It allows us to live in the present without dragging around all the pain and hurt with us.  It allows us to truly appreciate the here and now.

This song is also about depression, something a lot of us suffer from, hence the:

All things will come and pass,
for my walks are numbered
as I edge ever closer
to my last breaths

I think during a bout of depression its important to remember that our life is but one, and that this too shall pass. At the end of the day, despite all the ups and downs, life is an amazing gift.

Lauren K

Musical Seconds
Second Fresh